Embracing The Power of Uncertainty

imageI was just listening to an interview of Iyanla Vanzant by Jerry Clark while dropping our son at basketball practice, and had the impulse to write a post on the Power of Uncertainty.

Iyanla and Jerry were talking about how we’re all control freaks – we like to know how everything’s going to turn out before we do anything — and I realized that if we hold to this desire for control too tightly, we’ll never allow ourselves to create or experience anything new.

How’s this apply to business and life?

Imagine I had demanded that I knew how things would turn out with Rachelle before I dated her – we never would have been here today with 7 kids and 23 years of marriage, challenges, and rewarding adventures!

Or in business – if I had demanded that I knew whether a customer or potential business partner was going to say “yes” before I spoke with them – I never would have allowed the amazing relationships, discoveries, skill development, and business results that have unfolded in our lives.

And we’re still discovering and experiencing new things – in fact, that’s what makes life interesting.

Now I realize that a total feeling of not being in control could be frightening – so here are three things I’ve found particularly helpful in allowing and even embracing this power of uncertainty in my business and life that I believe will assist you, too:

1. Courage to embrace – regardless of your belief in a Higher Power or the Universe being for you, having the courage to embrace the uncertainty and adventure of life makes things a lot more interesting.  Iyanla spoke with Jerry about the difference between “choice” and “decision” – decision weighs facts and figures and is based on what you can see and know. Choice opens the door to possibility, even though you may not know what all those possibilities are or don’t know how everything’s going to turn out.  Choosing to embrace the uncertainty, challenges, and possibilities of life is one of those choices, and is a powerful strategy for allowing more into your life.

2. Trust – for those of us who do believe in God, a Higher Power, or even simply that the Universe is working for our good – trusting this power and process even though we can’t always see how things will work out ourselves is a key process that can open us to the uncertainty – and the possibilities – of life that we otherwise may shy away from, and allows us to go forward without fear.

3. Others’ stories – the third factor I’ve found richly empowering that essentially makes it easier to practice #1 and #2 above is to listen to, read, and continually enjoy the stories of others who’ve experienced the richness and worthwhileness of embracing uncertainty and stepping into possibility in their own lives.  In essence, you can build up an “internal library” of these stories that becomes a well from which to draw as you navigate your own moments of challenge, uncertainty, and new doors of possibility opening before you.

Now think back on your own life for a moment. What’s one of the most rewarding experiences you’ve had? I bet at some point along the way, there was a door of possibility you were willing to walk through, without fully knowing or being “in control” of what was on the other side.

Have one of these examples you’re willing to share? We’d love to hear from you in the comments below!

May we all continue to have the courage and trust to embrace the uncertainties — and the possibilities — before us in the years ahead.

Here’s to creating a life you love!

Ben

P.S.  Want daily tips to energize and equip you in business and in life?  Catch live “Quantum Moments” with me on my Facebook page Mon – Saturday mornings at 9am Eastern time.  See you there!

3 Keys To Be More Effective Working With People

Recently I had the privilege of reconnecting with a friend whom I first met in grade school. She’s had quite a journey since we were last in touch, and now coaches high-level executives, CEOs, and other prominent figures in business, healthcare, politics, and the arts.

As we caught up on our lives and what each other has been doing, I had the chance to interview her a bit more about her work, and I was deeply impacted by both what she said, and what I felt as she said it.

Here are 3 of the lessons I learned from her that can assist us all in advancing our business and our lives as we interact with others:

Go For It

Get the “ask”

1) Life is short — so go for it. Get the “ask”. Whether it’s inviting someone to share a project or vision, to coach you or be coached by you, to partner with you, or simply to try something, my friend said she’s learned that “if I don’t ask, nothing is going to happen. I might as well swing for the fences; at worst I may eventually have to pick up the bat.”

Be intentional

2) I noticed that she is very intentional. In her case, prayerfully so. She prays before contacting someone, and when she notices someone who’s work or contribution she appreciates, she’s very intentional about reaching out to them, letting them know how much she appreciates their work, and then taking that additional step to say “I would love to coach you.”

Sound a bit forward?

What was intriguing was her genuine appreciation for people and her genuine confidence that she could add value.

And rather than worrying what they’d think, or being caught up in conflicting feelings about wanting something from someone or trying to get someone to do something, she was completely focused on her appreciation for them and her desire — and competence — to serve and contribute value to them and their work.

How could this be applied even if you’re not a coach?

Perhaps you have something that could teach people how to do something better, or a product you market that could improve their lives.

Yet you, like most of us at one point or another, may still feel a little awkward because if they chose your program or your solution, you would be receiving something in return.

What if you could become so comfortable, so confident, and so appreciative like my friend that you had no problem letting people know you had something that could serve them, and that you would love to connect them, open a possibility for them, or serve them with what you had to offer?

Now before you say, “I’m just not like that” — my friend wasn’t that way initially, either.

She learned.

She grew.

She cultivated her mindset and her skills, and I’m glad she shared
them so openly with me the other day.

My clients can tell I love them

3) Here’s the final point — it builds on the other two. My friend said, “My clients can tell I love them.”

She has a genuine desire to see these high-profile people — people that many of us might feel intimidated by — have the support they need to function and serve at their best, and her genuine love for people comes across, especially since it’s not “muddled” by her worrying about what they might think.

So there you have it.

Three powerful insights I both learned and felt in talking with my friend about her work.

Chew on these a bit, and ask yourself, how can you apply them to your own life and work with people?

Can people feel your confidence, your appreciation for them, and your genuine desire to serve them?

Let me know any questions or insights this triggers in you — I’d love to hear your comments and feedback below!

Here’s to creating a life you love!

Ben

How to Handle Questions in 2 Easy Steps

Here’s a quick 2-step process for “handling” a question or objection — particularly for those of you in business, marketing, or sales, although as mentioned in the one minute clip below, this could be used for virtually any kind of question, even when sharing an idea or belief. Enjoy!

Creating An Energized Start to Your Day

Just shared this quick video message with my business partners &
thought you’d benefit from these perspectives as well — Enjoy!

How do you create your own energized start to your day? Feel
free to share your own experience in the comments below.

3 Daily Keys to Moving Forward in Your Business & Your Life

Here are 3 quick yet powerful keys that have a made a big difference
for me in creating the business and life we now enjoy:

I look forward to hearing your own experience, and any keys you’d
like to share, in the comments below!

Dr. Ben