Here’s a quick but key one-minute video tip. We chuckled when we saw the seeming “antennae” I have…but the content & practice – creating a weekly time for Vision – has been key for us…Enjoy, and let me know if you have a similar practice or experience in the comments below!
Author: Dr. Ben
I'm a doc who was gone in the office, then found a way to be home with my wife and now 7 kids, while making a difference in people's lives around the globe. I love good books, adventures with my family, dark chocolate with coconut, & empowering moms & dads to create a business and ultimately, a life they love.
Learn more at www.drbenlo.com
I look forward to connecting with you!
Dr. Ben One Minute Video Tip – Focus on the Next Step You Can Take
Here’s a quick tip filmed at New Buffalo harbor in Michigan last weekend. Please excuse the outdoor noise & pocket camera…enjoy the content, and leave your own comments, applications, or insights in the comments below!
An evening with “wine guy” Gary Vaynerchuk, and living your passion.
Had the special treat of riding the South Shore Line from
Michigan City to Chicago Thursday evening, and then walking
up the brightly lit Michigan Avenue to a special evening with
“wine-guy” and bestselling Crush It author Gary Vaynerchuk,
hosted by Kelly Olexa and a number of Chicago-area entrepreneurs.
Walking up Michigan Avenue and glancing in all the amazing
store windows, I felt like a tourist, and realized how long
it’s been since I was last there…I’ve been enjoying forests,
beaches, and sand dunes with my wife & 6 kids here in Michigan.
That evening was powerful–both because of the rather “intimate”
time with Gary, as well as the camaraderie with so many
energetic and visionary entrepreneurs, and I wanted to post
a few take-aways from the evening here, both for myself, and
for those of you fortunate enough to stumble upon this post. 🙂
First off, a comment on connecting at events like this–when
I first walked in and saw the “venue” – no chairs or sitting
down to be “presented to”…I felt a little inward groan…even
though “connecting” is a large part of why I came…
Initially I didn’t see a familiar face…
So…
The first step was to connect with a few people there…ask
a question, introduce myself, be interested in finding out
what others do and what had brought them to this event.
Along the way, I ended up encountering both people I’d
recently met at other events and begun to develop a connection
with, as well as meeting some really great “new” people and
even a few I was able to “share” the evening’s experience
with.
Now to Gary…for those of you that know anything about him,
he’s the same in person as on his videos…though one thing
that perhaps strikes you even further in person is the
wonderful combination of extreme energy and self-confidence
combined with a wonderful ability to be self-depracating
and truly connect, care, and be interested in everyone
around him–whether it’s as a group, or afterward when he’s
signing books.
It must have been a long evening for Gary, with all the traveling
he’s been doing…and he ended up forgoing food while he
spoke with us…and then the food was gone…and yet
the compassion & appreciation in his eyes as I thanked him
briefly after getting a picture with him and receiving
his signature on my book was very impactful, and I hope
you all get a chance to meet him in person someday, as well
as to learn from him “from afar.”
I also took special note that during the evening
I heard several people mention specifically that they had
made decisions that had set them on a personal or business
course which they were passionate about, and which they
attributed fully to Gary and the vision and passion they
received from him at some point in the past year or two.
Very powerful to see a living example of someone living &
sharing his passion, and seeing firsthand the impact this
has on others’ lives…and I believe the cascade effect
is only just beginning as Gary and others like him live
true to who they are and inspire others to do the same.
…though Gary certainly is leading the way. In fact, Seth
Godin apparently recently sent Gary a very flattering
email that simply said, “You’re making the rest of us look
bad.”
Let me close with a few key quotes I jotted down from
Gary…and also highly encourage you to get a copy of
his book Crush It, as well as visit him at his Wine Library TV video blog
or GaryVaynerchuk.com and then ask yourself, what’s key about
the next step you take in YOUR business and in YOUR life…
…and see which quotes below trigger something in you that you
can act on or apply right away.
First, Gary admonished us all to really, really
appreciate this time that we’re in…he essentially
said if we can’t appreciate this time, then we’re not
paying attention.
Then telling us a bit more about himself and how he
thinks, here’s some quotes:
“I desperately want everyone to win.”
“I wrote Crush It in order to get emails from everyone
in this room in January or February saying, ‘Thank you.'”
“I have no emotional attachments to ‘converting’ anyone…
though I love when people ‘get it’.”
**Know who you are.**
“When people don’t like me, I get it. I respect people’s
opinions, and I try very hard to meet them and let people
know who I am…I outcare everyone. It’s who I’ve always
been.”
“I’ve only tried to be really good at what I’m good at
instead of focusing on what I’m bad at.”
“I’m grateful & I’m aware.”
“Your self-esteem & your positive energy is by far the
difference-maker.”
“People that are enthusiasts ARE experts.”
“I’m a very good messenger.”
“When’s the time to leave your job? The second you
can afford it. I’m extremely practical. But you
can live pretty ‘raw’ – that let’s you jump quicker.”
“The softer you sell, the better you sell.”
“Content is at a record low in being monetized & at an
all time high in value — it’s the honey that gets the
bees. You’ve got to have it.”
“If you’re not talking to the world, you are not going
to be in a positive business situation.”
And with your content–“come at it from entertainment,
education, and value — not sales.”
“You’ve got to bring value. The second you stop trying
to sell, the second you start selling better.”
“The reason people root for me to win is because I rooted
for them to win first.”
“I don’t make decisions based on the money; I make
decisions based on the brand.”
“Anything I believe in, I invest in.”
“Education is the game. You don’t win by accident.”
“Hard work, effort, & caring is going to be the game-
changer.”
Here’s to living your passion, making conscious choices
in your own life and business, and becoming one more
person who impacts others by knowing who you are and
sharing it with the world!
And thanks, Gary!
Dr. Ben
P.S. If you were there that night, or have been impacted
by Gary or any of the ideas above, would love to hear
your own comments & stories below!
For entrepreneurs – how I used Facebook this week to connect with local business prospects I didn’t know previously
Just a quick note as Social Media continues to explode new
ways to connect and re-connect faster than ever before.
Just this week, in looking for referrals for a key project
I’m working on,I was given a couple local names that may be
a good fit.
In the past, I may have called them directly using the 3rd-
party reference, but still essentially coming “out-of-the-blue”
and “cold”.
What I was able to do instead this week, was find them on
Facebook and discover we have several mutual “friends” including
the person who referred me.
So rather than call them immediately, I sent them a quick
message referencing our mutual contacts and shared interests,
and that I was looking forward to connecting further.
They immediately reciprocated, and now I have a channel for
creating “familiarity”, as Facebook expert Robert Grant puts it,
and building a connection from which it will be much easier
to then explore the possibilities of collaborating on a project,
rather than approaching them “cold” when they still have almost no
reference for how I fit into their “map of the world”.
So Facebook (as well as Twitter and other forms of social media)
now allow avenues of communication and connection that previously
didn’t exist–and which can happen fast–to create new associations,
partnerships, and business and personal results, depending
on what you’re seeking.
Little nuggets like this can transform the way you do business,
and make it a lot more rewarding and fun as well, and if you’d
like to dive in and learn more right away, I just learned of a
recorded interview of Robert Grant (from yesterday) on how to
use Facebook effectively for business. Robert is interviewed by
online educator and entrepreneur Alex Mandossian, and you can
access the interview right here (affiliate link).
If this is an area that interests you, I’d hop on this first
thing this weekend, as I understand there’s some special training
you can choose to access as a result, but only until Midnight
Sunday.
Enjoy!
Dr. Ben
What Are You Comparing To?
Been pondering something we do everyday, almost without
thinking, that powerfully affects how we feel about ourselves
and what we’re doing.
The neat thing is that as we become aware of this, we can
consciously use this tendency in a way that purposefully
benefits us.
Whether it’s with our health, our weight, our “productiveness”
and “success”, our parenting, our relationships, or something
else…
…I’ve found that how we feel in a given moment is often
directly impacted by what we choose to “compare to.”
Even just for ourselves—-are we comparing to what’s gone before,
and noting the progress we’ve made…or are we comparing to
what hasn’t happened yet, and feeling frustrated or overwhelmed,
or even a “failure”?
It’s interesting how our brains work.
Dan Ariely, a researcher formerly from my alma mater MIT, a
great TED speaker, and author of Predictably Irrational, has
pointed out that human beings tend to assign value only in
reference to something else. I once heard him give the example
of Olympic medalists, asking, “Who do you think is generally
happier with their medal – silver medalists, or bronze medalists?”
The natural thought would be that silver is better than bronze,
but his research showed that the bronze medalists were generally
happier, and his reasoning was that the silver medalists looked
at the gold and felt badly that they came so close and didn’t
“make it”, whereas the bronze medalists looked at all the others
who didn’t get a medal, and were glad they got a medal at all…
So back to us and our daily lives – now that you know your brain
is constantly looking for references to “compare to” and decide
how to feel, you can choose to compare in ways that feel good…
that inspire you to move forward…
rather than ways that overwhelm you or shut you down.
How?
Begin by finding something to appreciate…something you’ve done
well, something that’s gone well…maybe right now it’s just your
own awareness or the potential for things to be different now
that you’re thinking differently.
Next, focus on progress…compare in ways that you feel good about
the progress you’re making…if there’s no outward “progress” yet,
begin by noting that your direction is different.
Perhaps the progress is simply that you’ve held a certain focus or
direction longer than before.
In fact, what direction you’re heading is so much more important
than where you are right now. (You can read more about that here.)
In the meantime, throughout the day, ask yourself, “What am I
comparing to?” and consciously choose comparisons that inspire you
to move forward, rather than those that make you feel small or
inadequate.
Deal?
How about leaving a comment about your own comparisons and
experiences below.
I look forward to hearing from you!
Dr. Ben
P.S. Been enjoying this music from Hayley Westenra as I write this,
and thought I’d post it directly for you here. Enjoy!